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Episode 3 · 1 year ago
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Episode 3 · 1 year ago
Fear of Fireworks
ABOUT THIS EPISODE
So I want to read the blow we've got onyou and you can sort of stop me at certain points. It says here your Christoper Por Jones, the breakthrough expert, an therapist place in Harley Street. That's Trueo, correct,yeah, so an talkd generally about stuff, but tell me about Yo cu av, the breakthrough expert, whatparticular techniques I, how whats it work? What are you working with? Well,I pecialized in fear, phobia and anxiety is my main areas of expertive.So I work in those areas and help people go from being perrified,basically to to being able to do the things they want to do, whether be youknow, tating the fireworks or getting on a plane or facing a spider orwhatever it is t holding them back right. So the key. So it's Sosia,Christopher Hersel Po, hundreds of people that go and get their lives back,but this is the one that I find interesting, even kulled, his own moralfear of flying to the extent whe's able to take a soat seeng flight trough, thepyrinees strapped to the outside of a helicopter. Yeah, that's correct! Now, I'm notsuggesting that o the Treatment Ino so you're, probably going to come meclient now, CAU, they're, goingto. Think Oh, is that what he does to helppeople get over? That's not what I do to help people get over it and yeah. I definitely recommend you makesure your fear of flying is gone before you cacl anything like that, and I actually, I jusgarraed my clientsfrom doing that. So, for example, I had a Clin the other day. Ou had a fear ofelevators because he was American right, ter Lif and he said yeah welcome the sixth floor,but I have to go to the, but it goes up to et, and so we worked on it and hesaid yeah feel fine. I'm going Na go the ATX floor now and I'm like why?Don't you stort, by going to the tent, checking how you feel then e foreveryone, someteong tare, like all on nothing o yeah? That was that was myapproach. I wanted to chest. My fear wish gone so a I had. Yes, I was able to do it quitequite well. I would say you know. I say,...
...even if you don't have a fear of flyingw structure outside of a hedicopter, will induce certain concerns. I wouldsay so. I wouldn't suggest you're necessarily PHOBIC. If you don't wantto do that, you just might be more faitn than I was. I Wa Jusnsensi thisSu so will exactly and that yeah go ahead.Oay Say so we're not talking about old fashioned te version therapy like thatwould be we're Ol. No coative therapy well t! So it's so what Whal I do is amix of different things. I use a whole range of different approaches fromhypnotherapy who compmetide behavior therapy to nbar o EFC, a bunch of timeline,paverage whole harm at the whole rager oter thing probably never heard of, butthe differenceis it's about targeting those triggers. So what's happened whenyou've got a fear, whether it be of fyworks or you know, O say ElevatorsLif flying something. That's happened in your path to create that fear, sothat can be something obvious like a turbulin flight when you're eight yearsold and thin that moment, your brain goes tislecalls danger and then,whenever you experience that thing again in future you're going into spideor response the fight flight, O freed response. So you know so, for example,sticking with the flaing. Someone can be told that it's safe, they can readall the statistics, but there' still that emotional part of them thatsacting like the first time they created thatfear. It's still creating that emotional response and when you can goand find those trickets find those emotions and change the links. So theperson can no longer feel the fear. Then they know the brain. No long has areference of being afraid of things that it doesn't need to be afraid off,basicaly and so that that's effectively the work.I do now everyone's different to how d you get. There is Difese for everyone,but that's a basically what I do so it's about so before you had face. Youfear it's about. Let Min go of the...
...emotions. You liag to it, so you don'thave to power through or expose yourself, because sometimes I find thatmakes people a lot worse as well. Nthe major patent, yeah yeah. Definitely, Ithink, I think, there's some very outmoded psychogical therapis that areproven e, not to work and because you're using thes ECLECTIC approach. IfI use that word, an integrated approach, yeah quit Taki, O pt Yeah Integrateis,a good good name to that's what I call it yeah. So it's yeah and I think that that's also bethe key wit when someone has just even if it's a moten terapi someone has justwone therapy, it either works or it doesn'td rather than basing on the deck. So some people arethinking pictures. Some people are very visual in the way they imagine. Somepeople are much more analytical. You need to Ge od tof work with that partof person where they are yeah and I think somethings aren't aren't directwill yolatit. So sometimes I find tat someone who tax goes to traditionalhytherapy for fear. Te O will now imagine thatthing and notice how much more relax you being and lot better than fating it,but it, but that might not be the cause so, for example, going to flying let's go back to flying.If you go back to fear of flying, it may be, like I say,a specific event like turbulence when you were young, but it may just be afeeling of being out of control not liking that Thilin beond control, whichyou latter in life linke to flying. So you need to be ad o target. What id it,what exactly caused it and it might if's not always directly relevant aswell yeah. That's that's! So! It's like an overgeneralization of fear, responseto other things, yeah agai exactly exactly and come, and the other thingis of caurse the fear of the fear, which is when someone's spent so longbeing afraid of this thing. But just the thought about the buildup that itmight happen again in future is also tetting. Someone of so they almost havetwo phobias, the phobia that they might have. The phobia you know GE, which isalso very interesting, so what I mean was it your own phobi that led you towork with phobia specifically because I...
...should have ended before you s becamespecialist. You were yetting general areas. I guess I mean I still do do otherthings as well, but the reason yeah the reason I picke that as a specialty, wasbecause it was. It was one of the areas that I had a lot of fears and injury,and so yeah, that's how I got through it,because it's, I think, when you've been there yourself. It's easy to understand. I thinksomeone who doesn't have a phobia tends to go. You can just just get over it.You know waving so Cilly, but it's an irrational pobio. It's in the title.It's not rational and fopias aren't creaty through logic and they're notsold fruit like I they're craty through an emotional respond. Yeah totallyagree, and I think it's that idea of the as te fact that you know that thephobic responds put into a logic context is makes perfect sense. Doesn'tit because you're saving yourself frand protecting yourself from somethingthat's out yeah, but the th generalization of that Fer? And that's the point. The other thing Iwould say the. However, however inlogical something seems it is meetingon the subconscious. Leveli is trying to meet a need so most commonly withfears and phobias. It's some form of trying to protect jous. I don't knowthat Cantreduti when you look at it logically, but the subconsciousunconscious mind doesn't work on he oject, so they work on emotion exactlyso. If somebody this weak, I mean the press. relise was talking about yourphonophobia and the sort of firyrophobius which is going to bepretty Approvan to some people. This weekend, hello, yeah Syeah canHeyehereso the yeah yes wean. What can somebody do to help themselvesimmediately before they seek your longer term? Sport Yeah well, obviously, phon a phobiisfear of live noises and Piraphobias, a fice fear of fint. So obviously abumfire night you're going to get those thos aregoing to be the worst. I think you know the fear of loudnoises phonophobia is is one of the ones,...
...but instinctively you know we aretaught to avoid very loud ace noises, because you know F, earthquakes andThings II, sortof, Aour, primitive brains, designed to do that. I think.Normally, though, it's going to be exacebated by being made to be jumpwhen you're little. So I went to a Flyr with this play and you were a bit tooyoung to be there and you were terrified t at maybe quite common.That's going to create the feary you, so the key is, as I say thing with anyphobias, is to find out what was it in your past that triggered this event.You know, and what do I ask yourself? What do I need to believe in order tofeel this way right? What do I need to believe about fireworks or about thislad? Noridge in Orderto feel that what I need to believe of that I'm I'm youknow indanger. I need to bleave that and again it probably won't be logical,but just write that down and then it to back changing tme emotion. So thesimplest one that everyone talks about just taking deepress I in the moment,if you just breathe and send to yourself I do have if I can give myselfa little pluck a you- have lots of free youtube tips which cover a rangeof different protesses for removing your phobia reduting at leastand some of or dealing with in the moment and somewhere going into thepast and finding the record and there on my youtube channel, which use break Directbert tvcom at andI al to have a few audios that can help people as well, both o Phobias andanxieties, which ar able on my websate and that's don't what I woeld recommendgo ahead. Say Your website is Christopher Pau, jomes, dotonet yeah, that's correct yeah, so you can downoadthe audios there. But basically, if you wantto, he technique anythingthat where you try and do two things at once. So, if you're trying to think ofyour the time you couldn't stop laughing while trying to experienceyour plear, it's very hard to do, popthat one it Isso, you know so soit's tig like that and what's cooed cross lafterol stimulation. Anytechniques like that will help reduce...
Ou. Her Yeah Tim, two things thatparbly immediately going back to the Ro Ferst Ting. You said about the phobiapeople deaing with themselves. One is to try and identify the initialsensitizing event. Then this Ega tes, like the second one,was to identify what what they're really frightened o think you said, owhat the fear is the feelings around that yeah. What d? What do you believein or that's at at yeah, so Yeah Wel? So what's the first one may not bedirectly accessible because of all the unconscious stuff? That's going on thesecond one. Yean that way therapy kind of thing: Tar, you, you relax theconcou mind or mind fornes techniques, where you can relaxan so go ahead, yeah,but the second one is immediately accessible. Isn't it? What are yourbeliefs around the fear in order to create that we haveto? That's really Useune, Ithink that's a very powerful one so and OA Dotno F, I was Gono, say one of the things Ialways take to my client. Is You know people go o? I don't want to feelafraid and I go well whose emotions are they because, while it's maybesubconscious you do something with your thoughts with the pictures you make inyour head, wifeeling Youe having the body ith the way you breathe in orderto feel good, and you do that to feel bad as well. So there's a wholestrategy for feeling scared and the whole stratse is feeling good. Now,obviously, something in your Pasto happened to tricker that, but it'snoticing, what are you doing internally to fire off all though thiin right toegeher very interesting, very tein work as well, and I think it's yeah will certainly direct people toyour your website and your youtube videos. If tes soften thanks you verymuch, they can contact you for private support if they need that, yes, theycan yeah. Well, I do offer threethirty minute consultation as well, for anyonewh who thinks hi might be able to help them or right would be interested inworking with me and that could be foun on the website. FANTASIC will make surewel put that out for you. I S alsoy like to add, because I know it's a bitof a rus conversation and signs docting,...
Brilliant Ot, that your in Pat Bu isanything we've missed that you think could mention. I mean icoming to my mind right now,yeah, not particularly I mean I could go into. I could go into differentTechnie I could took about my I say my favoriteis what I call the Harry Potter, Ay again kin yeah, we w to talk about this. How much timedo we have very quicklyikygthehow? We haveoayoh that', Fie tat, so IV startedto say before that in order to feel a certain way. We need to make picturesin hour minds. We need to feel a certain thing. We need to have a belief.We need to say something in our head. So if you think of the Harry Potter, Ican say movies, but a lot of people v read the books as well, where you havethe ridiculous spell so that spider goes fom me perrifying to Beig on Brote,CAD, yeah Goti. You do that internally, that Pa Chango feel so you Mak imaginthat picture of you to going. You know, oh I'm scared of flying so you're,making a picture of the plane crashing. Okay. What would happen if I made thatPitchur, small and Black and white? What would happen if I made thatpicture like a simptons cartoon right? What would happen if I imagine o Bete Hill Music or actuallyplayed reny hill music, as I was taking off on the plane in my head, those kindof things and when you disrupp those internal patterns, you completelychange how you feel, because you can your self cunches mind can no longer beafraid and when it's no longer afraid it can no longer thin cangerd Toi. That tertainly makes sense to meactually O petraier. So what you'R saying makesa lot of sense? You know that yeah, you know I got you re, you HAV ING, anlpbackground by the fact you said initially sensotin event: That's nothommon, English speaking Sol. You would knowthat technique ad, what called logical level logical levels and yes, it woulddefinitely- and I think I think what I find interesting n talking to othertherapists about this- is that we have a talket. Do we not of thingsthat we know that Y work for us? They...
...may not belong to any particulardiscipline, but when you put them together in inteet, where you work forthe Individual Yep- and I am an NLP- I didn't mention. If Ididn't mention that I am an an Alpe trainer as well, I cin that, because ofthe fame we'v just used, edality shift an oh that' good. We could have a wholeNLP conversation sand, a lot of a lot of the Feri fastphobia changes like anchoring and and what's called the fat phobia e play itbackwards and logical levels and timeline therapy. Those kind of thingsare all very powerful for disrupting a phobia. Yes, they are there's thequestion and this is a will. This is a Geeki question, but because I'm talkingto a on practitioner, there's the issue sometimes of what is often calledsecondvygain of a behavior Yeh. Well, this is this. Is this isn't certainlywith anxiety? This is the big thing with anxiety is there's a belief thereas they say that that's really so s, everything is meeting a need, as I wassaying, for on some level, however, illogical, however irrational now soyet in therapy they cout in npnn and O to behave o tyrap in other psycholoktherapist. They call it, they call it second regame. So this is thesteponcious believe for holding on to this now, what a lot of so this couldbe something really strange like. Oh, when I was afraid I got a hug, so itgive me significant yes or it can be something as simple aslike. I was saying of th the simplest level. This keeps me safe, viacates, me,safe and so yesh. That is important,certainly with anxity conditions. Very often, there's a setting rigade.Holding on to that. I This I the event that happened in the past, where theperson didn't feel safe, so they create this anxiety because theretheybasically are living in five flights or freeze, and then that becomes overclock.So the world is a dangerous place, but in unless you teach the subconsciousmind that there are more more weight to...
...behave than just this one, it willcarry on so just trying to target the trigger without dealing with a secondregain. It won't work because the subconscious o mind is going to. Howwill I be safe? How will I be bet for you have to give the ubconscious mindmore choice, which is where different sort of hypnotic processes come inforthat yeah and that's where you probably will need the help of somebodyexperienced in the therapy and deliberat yeah yeah yeah it'Snot SelfHelpw, with a strict yeah yeah exactly so. If you have a fear, you can dothose techniques. In the moment, you can do scrambls if it's a deep rootedanxiety, but you definitely need to e definitely what you call the Lynch pinsholding up the police system yeah, and you definitely need to work on thosefirst before tackling before scrambling those patterns of behavior. So thanksfor that kind of SE, I've enjoyed this conceit's Chris Fol joms you're welcomeCeticayo Chris, you, okay with E wor. You can call me correct. Yeah, greatokay, Chris Phor Jones, the breakflo expert, Woo Christopher Paul Jones Dmet,you've got break fl expert TV is a youtube channel. Yeah Wat, Ay.
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